:: Woodstock FC ::

Woodstock 1 v Londoner 1

Woodstock FC's late christmas present from the fixture fairy was a Sunday afternoon game against last years champions The "Prima" Dons. Woodstock welcomed The Terminator Terry into the squad for the first time since joining from the Vikings in the summer.

Colin Johnson started the match on fire, well he did put deepheat on his face thinking it was sunscreen! If he needed any firing up that surely did the trick as he was soon in the thick of the action in what was to be a game played mostly in the midfield areas of the pitch.

The Dons looked dangerous down the flanks and nearly opened woodstock up early on but for a couple of last ditch tackles in the box. They did get the breakthrough they deserved on the 20 minute mark when McGuire was caught in possession on the half way line, a ball through to the forward who cooly finished into the roof of the net.

This seemed to stir the Woodstock into action and finally they where able to put the Dons under an amount of sustained pressure, several corners and long throw's from Carter could only produce half chances though.

Finally after some good work down the right between Hughes & Johnson the ball came to Anders on the right of the box, a great touch to beat the clumsy defender before letting rip, with the keeper beaten, the ball came back of the upright and the Dons were able to clear.

So at halftime the Woodstock could be confident of getting back in the game and the pressure on the Dons goal was expected to continue, however within the first 5 minutes the Dons where gifted 3 gilt edged chances by sloppy play from the Woodstock, only poor finishing and 2 great saves from Goalkeeper Lek prevented the game going beyond the Woodstock.

Then the turning point of the game perhaps, as Neil Hannard cleared the ball from the back, a very late lunge at the player from the Dons forward Downer saw Hannard angrily react and with both players exchanging blows they inevitably both saw red. Neil will now probably miss the rest of the season with injuries inflicted from this tackle.

This fired the Woodstock players into action and only after a prolonged break in play and Hannard stretchered off Woodstock began to mount some pressure, a quickly taken free kick from Anders was parried away by the keeper only to the feet of Carter, however he was denied brilliantly by the keeper from close range. Then a long clearance from Lek bounced on the edge of the Dons box and with the defence all over the place Aidan Hammill flicked the ball brilliantly over the keeper for the equaliser.

Not satisfied with the point Woodstock went for the win, great trickery from Hiro Nakamura had the Dons defender on his backside before Hiro found Noel free inside the box, slow to sort his feet out though his shot was blocked and the danger was clear.

And so the game finished at 1-1 and in all a satisfying performance considering it was the first game back after a 3 week break. Good performances all over the pitch , Neil Outram, Colin Johnson, Andy Hines and Tee all worthy of a mention for good performances dont let it go to your head though hey boys!

The teams support and wishes for a speedy recovery goes to Neil Hannard.

Match Report Chris Hughes

Woodstock 1 v Bull’s Head 1

2nd vs 3rd in this top of the table clash. The Bulls Head had inflicted Woodstock’s only defeat this season so this was always likely to be a hard fought game and a game Woodstock were looking to gain some measure of revenge. However, wasteful finishing and a late Bulls Head equaliser meant the spoils were shared the game ending 1-1.

The game began with both teams trying to settle into some kind of rhythm however this did not really happen with neither team able to get hold of the ball and play football. There were very few passages of play that were easy on the eye. However one such play resulted in aidan getting free on the right and whipping a ball in, which anders cooly slotted away, his 6th of the season, and a goal which keeps him the leagues joint top goal scorer this season.

Half Time Woodstock v Bulls Head 1-0

The second half started with Bulls Head pressing on for the equalizer and having the majority of the possession without actually creating any clear cut chances. Woodstock seemed to have weathered the storm and began to play some of their best football in the game and created a few chances to double the lead but were unable to do so, thwarted by some good goalkeeping and some wasteful finishing. The game seemed to be heading for a narrow 1-0 win to Woodstock however some good play by the Bulls Head and a cool finish 5 minutes from the end earned the Bulls Head a 1-1 draw.

There were several penalty claims in the game the first one of which for Woodstock only the referee himself will know why he did not give it as everyone else including the Bulls Head players thought it was a stonewall penalty.

Woodstock remain 2nd with 2 games in hand at the xmas break with the Londoner next up first game of 2008.

Match report by Dave McGuire

COSMOS "The Hitman" HATTON vs. WOODSTOCK "Pretty Boy" MAYWANDERER

The MC roared:

"This Championship bout has been sanctioned by the Bangkok Casuals League State Boxing Commission."

"In the white corner, wearing cosmic white shorts, weighing-in at 1595 lbs, with a record of 4 wins, 2 losses and 2 draws, the undefeated Heavyweight Champions of Phuket (Masters Cup) "Iron Mike" Cosmos."

"And in the blue corner, wearing electric blue shorts, weighing-in at 1619 lbs, with a record of 4 wins, 1 loss and 1 draw, the undisputed Super Lightweight Champions of Phuket (Masters Bowl) Woodstock "Sugar Ray" Wanderer."

"Let's get ready to rumble."

Round 1

Cosmos threw a lot of short clean passes early on but it was Woodstock who landed the first telling blow. Noel "Cinderella Man" Carter found himself unmarked in the area but his right hook was mistimed.

Round 2

Woodstock's superior aerial skills soon contributed to an early knockdown. Cosmos failed to clear a corner and Colin "Raging Bull" Johnson's sweet right jab pierced the defense. It was 0-1 on the judges' scorecard.

Round 3

Cosmos were on the ropes and Woodstock came close to adding another. A defensive error allowed Aidan "Hurricane" Hamill through on goal but his first-time shot smacked the post.

Round 4

Cosmos were looking very shaky and it was Anders "Rocky" Schmidt who nearly delivered the decisive blow. His rasping shot from the edge of the area hit the keeper straight in the ribs.

Round 5

It took until the final minute of the first half for Cosmos to penetrate "Winky" Woodstock's defense but the shot went weakly wide. Could Cosmos turn this fight around in the second half or could Woodstock deliver the knockout punch?

Round 6

Set-pieces were wreaking havoc in Cosmos' defense. A trademark bullet-throw from The Cinderella Man saw Tim "Witherspoon" Harrison glance the ball onto his own crossbar.

Round 7

Like the first half, and indeed the first match, Cosmos were enjoying more possession but it was Woodstock who were creating the openings as "Butterbean" Maew came close with an excellent header.

Round 8

Cosmos were finally rewarded for their endeavour as they floored their opponents with a quick counterpunch. "Smokin' Joe" Hiro was having an excellent game at centre back but he should have intercepted the final ball.

Round 9

Woodstock had now relinquished the lead in six of their seven games but the one game they hadn't was, ironically, against Cosmos. With time running out The Hurricane skipped past 3 defenders but his shot was tipped over the bar.

Round 10

With seconds remaining a free kick was lifted into the box. The ensuing melee gifted Woodstock a relatively easy opportunity, "Prince Naseem" Hannard kept his head and delivered the sucker blow. Cosmos hit the canvas and were down for the count. 1-2

Match report by Aidan Hamill

Winking Frog 1-2 Woodstock

After a 4 week absence due to a fixture rejig the Woodstock were back together to take on the Frog for the second time this season. All the pre match talk was of how not to get complacent with the opposition sitting at the foot of the table.

Khun Aek celebrating his 12th birthday was made the Captain for the day and his first start of the season, such as is the team spirit within the woodstock ranks. The Frog started the game how they would finish it with 10 men due to some late arrivals. Surely this was just a formality with the Woodstock bench packed with talent, the scarlet pimpernel Heggie making an appearance after circumnavigating nana plaza single handled for the past 2 months.

Some initial good play from the Woodstock team produced a few half chances but Anders and then Colin Johnson saw there efforts agonizingly wide, then after a great ball released Aidan down the right he had time to cross the ball to one of the onrushing Woodstock players, however Aidan had other ideas and gave the Frog keeper "the eye" before smashing the ball into the net from an impossible angle! 1-0 Woodstock.

The introduction of Williams could have produced the goal of the season when the Frog keepers clearance was superbly volleyed back goalwards by the aforementioned wing wizard only to be headed clear of danger by a covering Frog defender.

With Woodstock in full control what can only be put down to complacency crept in the ranks, and sloppy play and a lack of concentration allowed the Frog to put their only shot so far in the back of the net. 1-1 half time.

Minutes into the second half saw the Frog down to 10 men after an altercation between Anders and the Frog’s Kenny, Anders winning the battle of wits and Kenny losing his composure momentarily, saw him getting his marching orders.

With arguably the Frog’s best player off this surely would see woodstock go on to win comfortably, however dogged play from the Frog and poor play from all over the park in Woodstock colours made it a difficult remaining 30 mins. It took a great finish by Anders poking the ball past the oncoming frog keeper on the edge of the box to finally claim the victory and a valuable 3 points.

My vote for man of the match goes to Colin Johnson in the midfield not a great performance but a determined performance that carried the rest of the midfield through. A difficult afternoon but lest not forget that it was the first time in 4 weeks the team had played, and several players had an eye on the Cosmos game on Super Sunday.

Match report by Chris Hughes

Bulls Head 2 v Woodstock Wanderers 1

The final whistle blows bringing an end to Woodstock Wanderers 100% record and unbeaten start to the season. A hard fought 2-1 victory for the Bulls Head means Woodstock¹s 9 points from 3 games becomes 9 points from 4 games.

Just 2 hours earlier the squad gathered (well 61.9% of the squad) with hope and expectation, perhaps a little too confident of victory but at least the 13 who turned up arrived in good time before the kick-off. The pre match talk was full of warning against overconfidence and lack of effort against a team well known for their never say die attitude. With minutes to go before the start the team was announced;

Goalkeeper : Lek Defence (left to right): Andy, Colin, Dave, Ben Midfield (left to right): Golf, Noel, Gob, Aiden Forwards: Anders, Hiro Benchwarmers: Adam, Tee Banned dirty player: Chris

Off we go then, and for 10 minutes Woodstock control the game with some nice passing movements and glorious attacking play. One such attack led to a ball driven in from the right by Aiden across the goal mouth straight to the outstretched boot of Hiro. The spectators (and benchwarmers [and banned dirty player]) threw their arms up in elation for what was surely to be the opening goal. Hiro, however, had other ideas and wellied the ball so far over the crossbar that for a few seconds it showed up on the Thai aviation radar screen. Oh well, a bird in the bush is worth nine stitches on a mossy stone, as the saying goes.

The fine attacking play continued with most of the action coming from the right and also the ever dangerous throw-ins of Noel. It was, in fact, one of these fruitful throw-ins that brought Woodstock¹s first and only goal of the game. Noel threw from 10 miles away and the virtually unmarked ³bald beagle² Anders popped up to nod in his 4th of the season (3 of which have come from Noel¹s Herculean throws.) The only down side to this goal being that Anders increases his lead at the top of the goal scoring chart and retains the bragging rights for another week, and boy, can that man brag!

The goal seemed to bring the Bulls Head players to life and they began to stamp their influence on the game. Andy, who had just flown in on a 14 hour flight from the UK, was defending a lot down the left flank and his tiredness soon began to show. Time to make some changes and on went Tee to give Andy a breather.

Meanwhile, Adam was getting a bit thirsty on the bench and with the water jar only 20 yards away he picked up the bottle and went for it. Only 10 yards from the water out stepped 3 Bulls Head subs to get a closer view of the action on the pitch. Reading the danger signals, Adam with some nice footwork, side stepped to the right and spotting the gap made his way through and pulled the lever. In went the water off the side of the bottle. Nice!

Back on the pitch and the Bulls Head were becoming more and more threatening. The surprisingly ineffectual Golf on the left wasn¹t seeing much of the ball and with Ben and Hiro tiring, things were not looking good for Woodstock. Just before half time the threat became all too real as the Bulls Head attack, which was arguably under control by the Woodstock defence, was brought to an abrupt end by a lunging karate-style tackle from Ben. Foul, penalty, goal enough said.

Things went from bad to worse when Ben came off the pitch to be replaced by Adam. Fortunately though there wasn¹t enough time for him to do more damage before the half time whistle blew.

Second half and some more unmemorable, ineffectual play from the Woodstock can be summed up in this final paragraph. More long throw-ins (mostly won by the now heavily marked Anders) with no positive outcome, the occasional nice passing move, the arrival of an extremely late Kek, another obvious foul in the area by Tee, penalty, penalty saved by Lek, Woodstock players stand admiring the quickness of the Bulls Head players to react to the follow up, goal for Bulls Head, some late attacks by Woodstock, and finally, the final whistle. First defeat of the season but at least we¹ve got an easy one next weekend The Londoner!

Match report by Adam Williams.

Woodstock FC 4 v Cosmos FC 2

First versus second, this top of the table clash was always going to be a thriller; there was too much history between these two teams who had never even played each other for it not to be. Pre-game analysis was awash with rumours as to why key players, Nick Smart and Pedro “Ima” Kuntz, were missing for Cosmos. Chatree was also absent. Dubious.

The stands were full and the excitement palpable as kick-off drew near. Harold “The Hitman” Henthorn who scored 14 last season was made to play at centre-back. A strange decision that maybe only Steve McClaren can answer. Where would the goals come from for Cosmos? Woodstock trio of Anders “The Bald Eagle” Schmidt, Aidan “The Hamster” Hamill and Chris “Emelyn” Hughes boasted over fifty goals between them last season. Dazzling.

It was Cosmos who started the game more brightly. They enjoyed the lion’s share of possession but were unable to fashion any clear chances. Woodstock were able to soak up the pressure and repel the inevitable long balls that Kenny “Gasketblower” Gasser pumped hopefully forward. Several long shots flew high and wide. Some typical theatrical diving from Patrick “I-go-down-far-too-easily-for-a-big-guy” Menthorn resulted in a free kick just outside of the area. However, Kenny “Mr. Popular” Gasser curled it agonisingly wide. Kenny was himself guilty of some Menthorn shenanigans as he feigned injury after a non-existent elbow to the face. Deceitful.

The inevitable happened soon after. A bullet throw from Noel “Partner” Carter fizzed into the box where the indefatigable Eagle swooped. Some nice touches paved the way for an easy 3-yard finish. Woodstock one Cosmos nil. Delightful.

As Cosmos heads dropped and drooped, lightning speed saw Golf beat the off-side trap and from an acute angle he dinked the ball over the oncoming keeper. It was a straight race between the Hamster and Cosmos’ left back to meet Golf’s shot-cross. No contest as the left back was left back. Two-nil. Dashing.

Woodstock were soon in heaven when Woodstock’s shooting star, Golf, finished expertly. From inside the area on the left side and with his favoured right boot his low rocket blasted into the corner. Cosmos’ galaxy was imploding. Three-nil was universally accepted as a fair reflection of the first half. Delirium.

There was a moment of madness for Cosmos as Mauro and Harold squared up. Harold was incensed at the blame being apportioned to him and let Mauro know about it up close and personal. Mauro was lucky not to see red for the elbow he threw Harold’s way. Despicable.

Half time: 3-0

The second half started much the same as the first, Cosmos dominating both possession and territory. They finally beat the Woodstock back line and with only the keeper to beat the ball was lobbed over the keeper and spun frustratingly wide. Cosmos were awarded a penalty for the ensuing collision between keeper and forward. Stanley “No joy” Njoya blazed wide for his second penalty miss of the season. Cosmos were being sucked into a black hole. Dumbfounding.

Cosmos kept piling on the pressure and were unfortunate not to score as they hit both the post and crossbar in quick succession. Chris “Emelyn” Hughes was then sent off for two quick yellows. The first was unlucky; he inadvertently handled the ball as Kenny, fairly, shouldered him wide. The second was deserved; a cynical piece of obstruction. Woodstock were down to ten men with twenty-five minutes to go. Deflating.

Woodstock were on the back foot and Cosmos soon reduced the deficit. With the resulting space being found on the wings Patrick prodded in an superb cross. Three-one. Depressing.

However, Woodstock soon showed why they are the league-leaders and restored their three-goal cushion. They possess electric pace and brute force. This is coupled with an unrivalled desire to win. “We don’t need another” Hiro ( Nakamura ) scored on his competitive debut with a cool finish guaranteeing an undesired rival not to win. Four-one. Divine.

With only minutes to go Cosmos salvaged some pride with a second goal but it was too little too late. Whereas Cosmos dropped three places to fifth the final score maintained Woodstock’s position in the league; dominant.

Full time: Woodstock FC 4-2 Cosmos FC

Match report by Aidan Hamill.

Woodstock Wanderers 2 Winking Frog 1

A late late penalty from Anders Schmidt was enough to save Woodstock blushes and see them hit the top of the table on Saturday.

Schmidt put the Woodstock ahead on just 5 minutes after a superb ball from Gob had sent Schmidt past the last defender and he expertly squeezed the ball under the oncoming keeper and into the far corner. Just to make sure Hamill was coming in at the back post and made doubly sure the ball crossed the line, controversy of was it or wasn't it over the line before Hammill touched it which will go on all season but 1-0 was the main fact.

The frog came back just before half time after a sloppy pass by Colin Johnson left the defence exposed, the player broke clear of the backline and cool as you like rounded the keeper for a deserved equaliser.

The game was looking like a draw with the minutes ticking away until a lively Golf was hacked down by a clumsy challenge from the frogs Andrea inside the box, the referee in no doubt in awarding the spot kick which saw Schmidt sprint from the bench to dispatch a unstoppable kick into the keepers left corner, no doubt who scored that one!

Rivalry

The match brought together two teams with a lot of history, Woodstock having no fewer than 11 ex frog players in their squad, and with several being recently branded disloyal a explosive match was predicted.

The early goal however seemed to give the Woodstock players the feeling of complacency and the frog were not going down without a fight after being on the wrong end of a thumping the week before.

An excellent combination of passes between Tee & Noel however saw Tee clear into the box only to blaze wide with the goal gaping.

Woodstock could not seem to get their game together with the frog first to every ball, Goalkeeper Lek mad an excellent near post save from the frogs new Italian signing after Woodstock failed to clear their lines. And the frog deservedly got the equaliser on the stroke of halftime.

A bemused Woodstock left the pitch at half time wondering what had gone wrong after so many great performances the week before in Pattaya.

Slight improvement in the second half saw the Woodstock creating several chances, Golf beating half a dozen frog players before scuffing his final shot agonisingly wide.

Table Toppers

It looked like Woodstock would pay for their poor performance when McGuire brought down Leng in the box for a penalty, however man of the match Lek read Leng like a book and parried his spot kick away and a disappointed Leng was not alive to the rebound which was cleared.

Woodstock finally woke up and Golf looked certain to score when he raced past the frog defence only to find the side netting.

But two minutes before the final whistle, Golf made amends by teasing the frog defence into a rash tackle for a penalty which Schmidt despatched to send the Woodstock to the Summit of the Table and send the frog to the bottom of the table without a point.

match report by "Chris Hughes".

Pattaya 1 V Woodstock Wanderers 4

Pattaya away, the most sought after fixture in the footballing universe, a fixture that draws blood, sweat and tears (and that’s by just getting all the team to the game, well and the game itself, well and er, I suppose the after game celebrations too.)

Pattaya went into this game as favourites after a fine footballing display the week before in a friendly against the Londoner but on the day itself it was the Woodies who started off the stronger, intricate passing kept the Pattaya defence and midfield on there toes and also created space for Chris Hughes who was able to drill one home into the back of the (fish) net (tights) early on, a shot which gave the keeper no chance, 0-1 Woodies.

The Woodies could have doubled their lead moments later and left the opposition hanging out to dry as Hamill managed to latch onto a through ball and beat the keeper only to drYve the ball agonizingly wide. This was repeated moments later when again Hamill found himself on the opposite side of the keeper and yet another chance to send Pattaya to the cleaners was wasted as his shot tumbled past the goal mouth.

However it was Pattaya who took their chances and with a little help with the referee (who didn’t really get into the game until Joe and Mike arrived 35 minutes into the first half) they managed to put through number 9 in a front of the goal mouth scramble that resulted in a goal to Pattaya and a shiner to Hines (which would prove invaluable later on in the night). Pattaya 1- 1 Woodies.

It wasn’t long before the Woodies were on the offensive again and against the ref’s intended run of play managed to win a throw in. A throw from Carter that looked like 2000 metres long but was in fact probably only 1000 metres long managed to find the head of Anders the Bald eagle who flicked into the net 1-2 half time to the Woodies.

The start of the second half saw the two scousers Adam and Chris run rampant around the defence of Pattaya but unfortunately getting caught offside by five or six Pattaya players, Adam at times looking like he was running in high heels rather than football boots!!!

But it was the mighty Carter who was to extend the Woodies lead, a loose ball on the edge of the box connected with Noel’s weakest right foot (I say weakest as his left is weak too) for a cracking 2 million dollar or would that be 1 million dollar shot into the net – again the keeper stood no chance 3-1 Woodies.

By this time, Pattaya were bombarding the Woodies defence with the long ball, who stood strong and were able to soak the pressure as easily as a pre white wash.

The final nailing in Pattaya’s coffin came much later on in the night but during the game it came from Chris Hughes again, who with Pattaya pushing everyman forward found himself with acres of space to run and effectively put the goal into the back of the net 1-4 The game could have seen another goal, which could have seen Woodies top of the table. An excellent run on the right after spinning past the defender saw Hamill put a ‘clean’ cross across the open goal mouth, all was required was a touch from Anders who seemed to miss by a washing line’s width – incredible! Pattaya away; Woodstock game, set and match.

match report by "Ben Campbell".

Woodstock Wanderers 2 v Les Gaulois 1

Woodstock were looking to avenge the defeat at the hands of Les Gaulois the week before. They welcomed back Ben and Anders who had missed last weeks defeat. Chris, Hiro and Adam “unlucky mascot, when I play Woodstock lose “ Williams which meant we stood half a chance in the rematch. Also to the amazement of all Mike was early, with a clear head and without a bird in tow ( joe came later on his own ). A few changes had to be made as Kek was late so Ben played right back with Dave partnering Colin in the centre of defence. Les Gaulois also had a few changes with a different goalkeeper and David playing this week. Both teams started positively and there was little to choose between the two teams. Woodstock played some of their best football so far this season and moved the ball around well which eventually led to Golf scoring to put Woodstock up 1-0. Anders should have made it 2-0 shortly thereafter but his shot hit the post and rebounded to safety lets hope he finds his scoring boots for next week ! Woodstock kept Les Gaulois at bay until a few minutes before half time when Mike was penalized for bringing down David in the box. David earning a 10 for his theatrics.

Half time 1-1

The second half started much the same as the first half with not much to choose between the teams. Woodstock then started to get more and more of the ball and and with a defence well marshalled by Colin did not allow Les Gaulois any clear opportunities. The midfield were working hard with Neil, Gob, Tee and Mike breaking up the play and giving Woodstock more opportunities to score and anders, aidan and golf working tirelessly up front. Aidan then won a penalty that Louis Saha would have been proud of and Golf stepped up to slot away the spot kick to give Woodstock a 2-1 lead. More sustained pressure led to several chances with Golf forcing a good save from the keeper onto the bar. Woodstock were then able to see out the game and gain revenge over Les Gaulois 2-1.

This week the season starts with an away fixture at Pattaya which should be exciting for more reasons than one ! Question is do we ban Adam for the season or transfer him to Pattaya for this game ?

match report by "Dave McGuire".

Woodstock Wanderers 1 v Les Gaulois 3

A very hot day. Both teams started positively and the opening exchanges were evenly balanced. Les Gaulois then scored to take a 1-0 lead and Woodstock’s level of play after the goal was not the level they had played during other friendlies, however the opposition were much stronger than previous teams played this year and this showed as Les Gaulois were able to hold onto their lead until half time with Woodstock not able to make any inroads after the goal and deservedly went in 1-0 down at half time.

Half time 1-0

The second half started with even passages of play until a defensive blunder by Woodstock gifted Les Gaulois a second goal and a 2-0 lead. Credit to Woodstock as heads did not drop and after some sustained Woodstock pressure Chris Hughes blasted in a left footed 20 yarder into the bottom corner, which gave the keeper no chance. Mr Hughes’s first goal of the season. Woodstock then had Les Gaulois on the back foot and were dominating the game and were unlucky when andy hines cross / shot ( I say cross / he says shot :) ) hit the far post. Woodstock continued to pin Les Gaulois in their own half and from a long throw from Noel Carter, Hiro glanced a header off the post and the rebound unfortunately wrong footed Aidan Hamill who was there ready to pounce.

Woodstock continued to apply pressure but were caught out with a counter attack when Yannick got goal side of Mike Nilsson and made no mistake with an emphatic finish.

The game ended 3-1 to Les Gaulois and gave Woodstock their first defeat in 4 friendlies this season. Flattering score for French really and could quite easily have ended a draw but a clear indication of the season to come, where Division 1 promises to be a very tough and competitive league.

Rematch is in the pipeline with this weekend a possibility for a different outcome. Come On Woodstock !!

match report by "Dave McGuire".

Woodstock Wanderers 6-0 Vikings

In times gone by the Vikings were infamous for their raping and pillaging of all those who stood in their wake. Unfortunately, the only thing that was raped and pillaged on Saturday was the back of the Scans net, as Woodstock brushed them aside in a 6-0 encounter.

The game promised to have some bite as Anders 'The Bald Eagle’ K Schmidt made his first appearance against his old club. How would they react? Was there to be harsh treatment for Anders? Would they try and hurt him?

But at the start the tension was apparent as both teams flapped about the pitch trying the long ball. It wasn’t until the White lightning passing of the Woodies started to flow that the breakthrough came. Some crisp passing in midfield and Noel managed to strike with his weakest foot (not sure if that’s the left or the right as he doesn’t have a strong one) from just outside the box, the ball confusing the Scans goal keeper on the line and dipping just under the bar 1-0 Woodies.

This did little to stop the panicked long ball from both sides and it seemed for a while that the Scans were the stronger team, a constant barrage to the thin white line (well except for one or two eh Ben?) But some strong defending and organising both by Colin and Neil meant that the Woodies were able to quash most of the attacks.

Anders 'The Bald Eagle’ K Schmidt had been refereeing the little league game before this match and I’m sure he could see little difference in skill of the defence of his opponents. The second goal came from passing from the defence to the right wing. A lovely cross from the right by Aidan ? found Tee at the back post and an easy tap in.

It was at this point in the game Mike and Joe finally turned up, never mind White Lightning passes, these guys look like they’d been on White Lightning served in glasses. But fairness where it’s due they went out there (more mentally than physically) and gave it there best (which wasn’t a lot; most of it being spent the night/morning before). The third goal came just before half time and it was much to the annoyance of the Scans, as Anders opened his account for the Woodies against his former club.

Half time saw the same determination as the first and it wasn’t soon before Noel had doubled his account 4-0. With a bagful of near misses by ‘we don’t need another hero’ Hiro, Anders too doubled his tally with a lovely knee into the goal from 1 yard (a true striker’s finish) 5-0 Woodstock.

Noel also doubled his miss of the season account with a shot on his weakest left foot that would have given him a hat-trick and man of the match status. The final goal came however from Aidan Hamill who weaved in and out of the Scans defense like a meerkat in a burrow only to deftly put the ball around the keeper from a tight angle: 6-0.

With no real response from the Scans it was the Woodies turn to put the defense of the Scans to the test. Cross after cross entered the box with no clinical finishing. After all Anders had left the pitch with a suspected broken toe (nail).

match report by "Ben Campbell".

Woodstock Wanderers 3-0 Pickled Liver

It was a typical stinking hot day in Bangkok and Woodstock Wanderers were looking to extend their pre-season unbeaten run. Their crisp white shirts were dazzling in the Bangkok sunshine as they faced The Pickled Liver. Anders 'The Bald Eagle' K Schmidt was starting his first game for the Wanderers and he was partnered up front with another footballing animal Aidan 'The Hamster' Hamill.

Both teams found it difficult to settle down and the quality of football, early on, was diabolical. Many Woodstock players were nursing headaches and the heat was proving very uncomfortable. However, it was these pickled livers who combined well to give The Pickled Liver their first headache. After The Hamster had been fouled Andy 'The Beans" Hines whipped in a ferocious cross which caused mayhem in The Liver's box. The keeper came sprinting off his line but as the ball bounced high Joe 'The Hedgehog' Heggie looped a header over the hapless keeper. More impressive was The Hedgehog's goal celebration; picture Robbie Keane on acid. One nil was soon two nil as a quick throw to an even quicker hamster was crossed quickly into the area and tenacious Tee finished coolly. An early candidate for miss of the season went to Noel 'Partner' Carter who, after some great football, contrived to miss from seven yards out. Suffice to say the keeper was nowhere. Gaping hole springs to mind but, unlike most, this was a turn off. The Pickled started to dominate proceedings and should have scored but for Lek's acrobatic super save.

Both teams were struggling in the heat. The second half was pretty dull. The most exciting moment came when The Liver's keeper threw the ball to the Eagle thinking the whistle had been blown for offside. To save his blushes the referee decided to stop play much to the chagrin of the Wanderer's. Not much was happening until Aidan flicked Andy's cross through to Golf and from an acute angle it was three nil. Golf had an identical but easier opportunity to double his tally but pushed his shot inches wide.

Many players appeared unfit and subsequently were made to chase the game for long periods. This combined with some poor passing means there is much to be done. However, a three nil victory playing badly is encouraging.

Match Report by Aidan Hamill

Woodstock Wanderers 3 Web Works 2

This past Saturday 25/08/07 was the new and improved woodstock's first competitive game of this season. The game was against web works who contained several irish x-change players plus bartek from the bulls head. As the woodstock team warmed up it became clear that many players had been up to something the night before, particually Joe who looked decidely green.

The first half was positive overall and we showed a lot of promise with some fluid moves that lead to Hiro having a few opportunities in front of goal. Ben showed liquid pace down the right wing on two consecutive occasions that lead to him having to be subbed and have a lie down.

The defence looked strong and cleared up all that was offered with Gob showing some calm skills and Andy providing a lot of important headers. After a while more players turned up and we had a chance to see Golf show us his crafty skills and lightening pace, although to be fair we didnt see his passing ability ! After some close calls woodstock finally broke the dead lock and Golf got his first of the day from a goal line melee after a corner.

Half Time 1-0

Woodstock started the second half meaning business and had several chances in which to score but failed to hit the target. Web Works were under considerable pressure but some spurned chances and good saves kep Woodstock out. Web Works then had a corner and whilst Woddstock ball watched a Web Work player sneal in and scored to level the scores up at 1-1.

Woodstock continued to apply the pressure and Golf manage to evade his marker and put Woodstock 2-1 up. Some fluid play saw Hiro set Noel free and he finished well with his left foot as well !! Tired legs and some sloppy play led to a soft goal for Web Works but Woodstock held on and thoroughly deserved the win.

Match Report by Joe Heggie